Why did the student eat his homework? 
Because his teacher told him it was a piece of cake.

Why did the teacher send the clock to the principal's office? 
Toking to much.

What do you call an old clock? 
An old timer. from: Jonathan

What did the vampire give to his son? 
A new sports coffin. from: Samantha

Knock, Knock 
Who's there?
Horace
Horace who?
Horace racing is only for adults. from: Kristen

What do mice eat for breakfast? 
Mice crispies.

Why did the bubblegum cross the road? 
Because it was stuck to the chickens foot. 

What's white and scary?
Homework.

Why did the football coach go to the bank?
To get his quarter-back. from: Danielle Glynn

What was the lions job?
A roar-to-roar sales man. from: Danielle Glynn

What is a stupid flower?
A blooming idiot.

Knock, Knock
Who's there? 
Jamaica
Jamaica who?
Jamaician me crazy!!! from: Sydney 

What does an ant use to keep from getting cold?
Antifreeze.

What do you put a newborn bug in?
A Baby Buggy.

What happened when the bee phoned his friend?
He got a buzzy signal.

Which bug can tell your fortune?
A gypsy moth.

What do clouds wear under their clothes?
Thunderware. from: Christian Walsh

Which insect is always polite?
A ladybug.

Where did the tired trout go to sleep?
The riverbed.

Late at night two witches were flying on their broomsticks. They
were identical twins. No one could tell which witch was which.

What kind of gun goes buzz, buzz?
A beebee gun.

What happens when geese are in a traffic jam?
They honk.

Why couldn't the daisy ride its bike?
Its petals fell off.

Knock, knock, 
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
Knock, knock,
Who's there?
Banana
Banana who?
Knock, knock,
Who's there?
Orange
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana again? from: Cassie Bowers

What did the waiter say to the skunk?
Sorry, I can't take your odor.

How did the river hurt itself?
It had a waterfall.

If a cat lost its tail, where would it get another one?
At a re-tail store.

Where do polar bears keep their money?
In a snow bank.

What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer.

What did the judge say, when the skunk entered the room?
Odor in the court, odor in the court.

What do you get when a cat eats a lemon?
A sour puss.

Why was the puppy so quiet?
Because he was a hushpuppy.

Why did the farmer put a bell on the cow?
Because the cow's horn doesn't work.

What kind of dog tells time?
A watchdog.

What did the shark put in his peanut butter sandwich?
Jelly fish?

What has 4 eyes, but can't see?
Mississippi.

Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.

What do you call a bug that drops his trash on the ground?
A litterbug.